her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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