Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize