In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
just tell him i said nine months
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize