I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
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