One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
my poor anus
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
