Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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