Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
