Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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