He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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