absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
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