oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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