Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
