my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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