If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "