Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?