Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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