College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
