Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
