Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
