everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize