He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I smell like Dick and happiness
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