She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Randomize