Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Randomize
