This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
He passed out mid-signature
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
