I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
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it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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