hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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