The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Brb crying the tears of my youth
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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