is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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