his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
