the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
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