i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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