who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
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