How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
