just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Randomize
