doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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