we have officially lost it.
Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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