Texts From Last Night

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  (212): View more from New York

  I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight

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  (212): I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight http://tfl.nu/y0tm
  Replies (2) Good night (1224) Bad night (727)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Grow some girl-balls and come out already

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  (703): Grow some girl-balls and come out already http://tfl.nu/dlf5
  Replies (8) Good night (3246) Bad night (822)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl

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  (314): Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl http://tfl.nu/2p2x
  Replies (43) Good night (2909) Bad night (778)
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  (716): View more from New York

  Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.

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  (716): Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it. http://tfl.nu/yc12
  Replies (22) Good night (2690) Bad night (1936)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)

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  (403): SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :) http://tfl.nu/xxdx
  Replies (15) Good night (6046) Bad night (769)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me

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  (201): I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me http://tfl.nu/61f7
  Replies (24) Good night (818) Bad night (6489)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.

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  (519): I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle. http://tfl.nu/aifz
  Replies (11) Good night (3893) Bad night (2150)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.

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  (727): You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on. http://tfl.nu/u7oz
  Replies (22) Good night (1271) Bad night (5346)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.

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  (904): He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college. http://tfl.nu/3hcf
  Replies (19) Good night (2694) Bad night (6202)
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  (716): View more from New York

  My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.

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  (716): My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu. http://tfl.nu/wnz4
  Replies (4) Good night (4092) Bad night (832)
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  (949): View more from California

  We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.

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  (949): We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom. http://tfl.nu/b4pt
  Replies (24) Good night (6810) Bad night (2178)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick

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  (215): did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick http://tfl.nu/zk1d
  Replies (5) Good night (1119) Bad night (2392)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.

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  (773): I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again. http://tfl.nu/53df
  Replies (6) Good night (1851) Bad night (663)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"

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  (918): The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo" http://tfl.nu/4ubw
  Replies (3) Good night (499) Bad night (323)
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  (909): View more from California

  I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing

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  (909): I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing http://tfl.nu/z65e
  Replies (4) Good night (430) Bad night (758)

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