he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
23 Times Kids Said the Harshest Things
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
21 Rich People Confess The Best And Worst Things About Being Wealthy
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star