Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
25 Adults Reveal The Most Embarrassing Stories From When They Were Kids
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching