I want to walk on stilts...naked
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
