Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
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kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
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is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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