made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
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She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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