he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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