so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
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