I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
