Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Randomize
