why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
