I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
