We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
