No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
