me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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