i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
