I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
